Timmy Tourney

Hi everyone this is Katie, Tim's oldest daughter. I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who attended the Timmy Tourney. It was honestly the nicest thing that anyone has ever done for our family. It meant so much to my parents and even more to me. You rough and tough milldogs sure do have a soft side. [To everyone who doesn't know..the Timmy tournament was a poker tournament that Mike Kelley and Glenn Bell came up with as a fundraiser to raise money for mine and my sister's college fund.] On Saturday night at about 7:30 I was with my best friend and we both got to thinking that we should have went to the poker tournament just to see everyone and hear all the nice things that everyone had to say about my good ol' dad. But looking at all the pictures and watching the video was a nice replacement. For the last few days my dad has done nothing but lay in bed and today was the first time I saw him smile and it just happened to be when he was watching the video. We are all going to miss my dad's badass, funny and humble personality, me especially, but one thing that i strongly believe in is that everything happens for a reason.


PS- I'm feelin an annual Timmy Tourney..

Hospice

Just a quick update to let everyone know two days ago Tim decided to turn to hospice. Some people think this is a scary word or that we have given up, but that is not true. I find a peace in knowing that we have opted for comfort care in our home. Tim wants nothing more than to be surrounded by his girls. Tim's body grows weaker each day because of his inability to eat, but I believe his spirit grows stronger with acceptance. After 2 days of being too weak to get out of bed the hospice nurses decided to try Ritalin to act as a stimulant to give Tim some energy. It gave him the strength he needed to attend Katie's basketball game this afternoon. That has been his goal all week and i believe it to be a blessing
A big thank you goes out to everyone at shasta blood center. The girls were thrilled to find the wonderful care package on our front step. So many kind gifts and words of encouragement. We appreciate everyone of them. I apoligize I don't feel emotionally strong enough to call and update , but please know I am thinking of all of you and I feel your prayers.
Also to everyone who has sent a card, email, left a comment or phone message please know that I read or tell Tim about everyone. It is a wonderful gift you have given him to let him know that he touched your life and made a difference. It is also a gift to me and the girls because they have become my morning meditation. I read them everyday because it is comforting to know how many people love Tim as much as we do. Thanks , Kathy

There is no place like home

Today Tim came home from the hospital. There is nothing more peaceful than being in your own home. He is still very weak and not eating but an incredible peace has came over Tim. After much discussion we have opted to come home for awhile and relax away from treatment to regain a quality of life. We are at a in between stage. We are having home health come in for i.v. antibiotic treatments that Tim needs. We have not turned to hospice for care so we still have the option of chemo if Tim can beat this infection and maintain his strength. Tim did confide in me tonight that chemo was not that important to him anymore. He never wants to return to the hospital for treatment no matter what the future holds he will accept it at home. I wish I had the peace and acceptance of this situation that Tim has.
There are always so many thanks to send out I could never in my wildest dreams imagined the outpouring of love and support our family has been offered. The sierra pacific family never stops giving and have humbled Tim by starting a college fund for his girls. You will never know how much this means to us both. The Timmy tourney is the most touching thing I have ever heard of . I don't think Tim would mind me sharing this with you when Mary told him it brought tears to his eyes and he really hoped he could see pictures of this event. Hopefully we can have a video recorder there so Tim can experience a part of it.
Also a special thanks to all the staff at both kids schools I know you are looking out for the girls and it is very much appreciated. Katie's basketball team has been a wonderful sense of support for her right now she is lucky to have all you guys. Finally even though we couldn't wait to escape the hospital Thank you to the great staff who cared for Tim. We both became attached to to a few special nurses who I know are true angels. Thank you Randy, Steve, Penny and Rusti.
It is time to go spend some time with my husband, by the way I read all your comments to him and he enjoys them very much. Thanks again, Kathy

Great Idea

My mother in law told me of a wonderful idea that she wished would happen. I wanted to share it all with you in hopes you can make it happen. When any of you Tim's friends or family run into our girls ( Katie or Jessie) instead of asking how their dad is doing can you possibly relate a positive thing Tim has said about them. For example your dad is sure proud of you.I know he bragged on his girl's all the time. Thank- you very much.
Now for a update on Tim's condition. Saturday was a good day he was able to joke with the girls when they came by the hospital for a few minutes and he had a few visitors that he was able to enjoy. Since then things have gone down hill rapidly Tim has been unable to eat anything or keep it down for the last 2 days and today is starting out even worse. Yesterday was the first day I saw defeat in Tim's eyes and it scared me. I have had nurses mention hospice to me which makes me even more scared. Tim tells me he is still fighting but I am beginning to wonder for what this is not the quality of life any of us wish for Tim. I am dreading the hard decisions I fear we will have to make in the near future. Still praying for a miracle I will keep you updated.. Kathy

Desperate

Tim has a systemic blood infection which he is still trying to fight off. He really is a brave strong man. I'm still not sure how I got so lucky to marry this man. I can't tell you how scared and desperate I feel heading to the hospital this morning. Tim was not responding much at all yesterday. I have to tell myself today is a new day and there are miracles everyday. Please pray harder than ever. A quick thanks to Ellie and Pipper I received your kind gift in the mail yesterday and it helped cheer me up. I also want Jerry to know I read his thoughtful card to Tim because he didn't have the strength to read it but he heard it and loved it. I hope we get a little good news today... Kathy

Gratitude and Hope

I just want to take a moment to express gratitude to all those who are making life easier for us. A big thanks to the Demaagd's and Ella, Shane and Victoria for giving the girls a happy place to stay while we are at the hospital. I know you love the girls as much as Tim and I and it is a huge relief to know their needs are being met so wonderfully.
So many touching things have been done for us . John made a beautiful scrapbook about best friends that really lifted Tim's spirits. The support from the entire Sierra Pacific family is amazing. Even if I don't return phone calls know everyone is important and lifts our spirits.
One of my favorite thoughts about how good people are is Katie calling me at the hospital and saying "Mom why is there a stranger mowing our back yard?" I said because people are good. You know who you are (Thanks)
Mary, Vince, Cathy and the Bell family thanks for giving me hope and peace in my down times. Of course thanks to Tim's entire family and mine for everything you do to help Tim and I make it through every minute of the day.
Now probably what you are waiting for an update on Tim's condition. In the beginning I was praying for a cure, then quality years or months. I still pray for these things but I have learned to be grateful for the good moments Tim has when we can have good conversation. He is really battling the disease right now and doesn't have much strength for much of anything else. Anyway today we had 2 good 30 minute conversations which was 2 more than yesterday. I am grateful for that maybe things are moving in a positive direction. Praying for a miracle ...Kathy

Readmission

Unfortunately Tim was admitted to the hospital again today. There were a combination of problems. His jaundice has increased due to the previous stent that was placed in the biliary duct has became occluded. They will place a new stent tomorrow. Also he experienced some mental confusion over the weekend due to ammonia levels rising in the brain due to decreased liver function.I will update when I know more. Kathy